melicacy

my dad’s been buying birthday cakes every single year from bengawan solo EVER SINCE I WAS BORN its like a tradition already
i get it, its probably the “branded” cake shop in his era but after so many years obviously much better brands have been established and bengawan solo still remains as it was. i’m so sick and tired of bengawan solo birthday cakes they don’t even bother inventing new flavors its still the same old few. every year i get pissed off when they ask what cake i want because there isn’t much to choose from. and i HATE black forest cake, from anywhere/any shop. okay maybe i don’t hate it because i still love chocolate and whipped cream but i hate the combination of jam and cake.
next year i’m gonna be pissed off again because its still going to be bengawan solo I”M VERY CERTAIN ABOUT THIS. this is one reason why i hate birthdays. i even told my dad NOT to get me any cake yesterday when he asked what cake i wanted and i told him how sick and tired i am of their cakes. and that i hated black forest cakes.
BUT GUESS WHAT
HE STILL WENT TO BENGAWAN SOLO
but instead of the same few flavors he bought a “new” flavor that we haven’t tried before
-_-”

i just told him i didn’t want to cut the cake this year.

its mango and its not bad but i’d rather a cake from some place else. even a cheap cake from a neighborhood bakery like a normal chocolate sponge cake with tonnes of whipped cream would suffice.
i love cakes sooooo much i’m easily satisfied.
I JUST DON”T LIKE IT WHEN THEY CAN”T BE BOTHERED TO FIND OUT WHAT I REALLY LIKE AND THEN ASSUME THAT BENGAWAN SOLO IS THE BEST PLACE TO GET BIRTHDAY CAKES.

why can’t he just find out what i really want.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
I HATE BENGAWAN SOLO BIRTHDAY CAKES.
every single year they just have to piss me off during my birthday.

maybe that’s why i’m so full of hatred. because every single year during my birthday I”M FULL OF HATRED.

anyhows, i finished the entire cake at one go. idk if its due to my emotional eating or simply because i don’t want to be reminded of it and my birthday anymore

at my mother’s mother’s house.

with esmond, our yearly meet-up! lunar new year keeps us in contact after so many years (:

went to my mom’s side and dad’s side today.
other than enjoying the food idk how/why this festive is being celebrated
and i spoke less than 10 words in my grandma and big-aunt’s place but its not because i’m rude or proud or whatever? i just don’t know how to converse and.. i think i’m dislikable :/ my mom’s sister and cousin seem to dislike me.
but i love my big aunt (dad’s eldest sis) she’s the best aunt ever (: she reminds me so much of my grandma (her mom)
my other aunts have always favored my sis over me since young.
and this year my sis’s not in singapore so it was just awkward silence.

i feel like a pampered spoilt brat :/

so just now mom kept asking me to go shopping when i locked myself in my room crying. she’s been outside my door trying to console me, encourage me. she still has so much confidence in me despite me letting her down again and again..
after calming down i washed up and we went out
she just bought whatever i fancied without looking at the price tag. when i was browsing she just asked if i wanted it and it’s mine.
and she kept saying i’m her lucky star like when we were able to get a carpark lot easily near the lift despite the crowd (but i know she’s just trying to console me and trying to make me feel important so i won’t attempt suicide) i hate it when she says that because at times when we can’t find a lot I FEEL LIKE A FRIGGIN UNLUCKY JINX ):
i know she’s trying to console me but deep down inside i still hate myself.
so she bought me stuff trying to cheer me up
but there’s like nothing much i fancy anyway. the whole day at taka/wisma i just bought items from miss selfridge and GUESS?
in the end i wanted to go home because i can’t think of anywhere else we can shop at anymore after combing the entire orchard in 3 separate trips. she kept suggesting places to go like i haven’t shopped enough? but i don’t know what i want to buy either :S
then we ended up at marks & spencer and carrefour
bought lotsa yummies (: i think grocery shopping’s the best retail therapy ever. $100 spent on grocery cheered me up more than spending $300 at GUESS?

then we went to fetch my dad from work.

and i just found out that all along my dad knew about my bad behavior in school.. (LIKE LEAVING THE CLASS EARLIER THAN DISMISSAL TIME) like most recently one lecturer complained about my bad behavior to someone and that someone told my dad about it.. so he knew about it yet he didn’t mention a thing to me.. he didn’t lecture me nor question me.. he kept quiet about it until today when he saw how depressed i was.. but he just told me to stay calm and not throw my “MISSY TEMPER” in school unlike at home when i can do whatever pleases me. (LIKE OMG HE ACTUALLY SAID THATTTTTTTTTTTT but he didn’t ask me not to throw temper at home LOL)
i feel like a fool. he knew about my bad behavior all along and he just didn’t mention. like he has spies. (omg?)

i think i have the best parents ever. they don’t lecture me and they’ve never punished me. the first person who’s ever beaten me WAS MY PRIMARY SCHOOL CHINESE TEACHER I WILL REMEMBER HER FOR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!! she used a ruler to hit my hand like omg??? old school but yeah i think its kinda ILLEGAL for teachers to do that now? hah.
growing up like that, protected and people always giving in to me, i can’t adapt well to situations when people oppose me. that’s why i get so frustrated and defensive.
i don’t expect people to give in to me anyway because nobody owes me anything. its just that i get frustrated so just leave me alone?????????????

rahhhhhhhh

its just one of those days when i just have so much on my mind…

let’s start with the train ride.
it’s been like months since i last took a train to town and i’ve been getting stares which made me feel extremely out of place and uncomfortable.
i know i don’t blend in very much with the crowd but… what’s wrong with me???
okay people probably think i’m too skinny, what else?
i hate it when the word ugly keeps appearing in my head. i hate being ugly and i hate being judged.
i really wanna know what’s on their mind and why they’re staring.
the entire train ride was a torture.
i hate public transport ):
and i happened to stand in-front of an uncouth nose-digging loser. and encountered a middle-aged (probably jobless) dude rushing for the empty seat across the jam-packed cabin.
is that just a typical mrt scene nowadays, am i being too discriminating?
because i never want to take the mrt and experience all that again ):

next topic.. my wonderful dad.
i’m kinda thankful that my dad accepts me for who i am.. he’s like.. really nice?
seeing his daughter getting inked, rebellious and rude, and still looks forward to going for outings together.. he doesn’t judge me.. and he knows i lack discipline but he doesn’t make me feel bad about myself..
like that day before he left for penang he was saying he saw a letter from the army for me (yeah i guess they mass-sent it to whoever whatever) then he jokingly said that i sure “cannot make it” because of discipline (or rather, the lack of).
his tone was not the typical lecturing tone when “YOU LACK DISCIPLINE NOW IT”S TIME FOR ME TO TEACH YOU SOME MANNERS” kinda attitude..
he’s always giving me the forgiving and accepting tone.
i guess he wants me to learn by my mistakes and grow from them myself..
i feel so guilty because i’m such a horrible daughter.
sigh nvm.

me: mummy can you pass me my passport tmr?
mummy: okay.
why?
me:
i’m going overseas.
mummy: okay.
when?
me: *
mummy: okay.

“mel’s such a spoilt brat”
“she has such a horrible temper”
“she is blunt and too straightforward”
“she never hides her anger”
“she’s so grumpy”
“why do people have to give in to her all the time”
“she complains about everything that doesn’t go her way”
“she’s selfish”
“she only thinks of herself”
“she always wants the best to herself”
“she never cares about anyone or anything not related to her”
“she’s heartless”
(and whatever else others think of me)

no wonder she doesn’t have any friends.
no wonder her mother finds it a chore to support her.
no wonder she deserves to just die.

every time i try to kill myself it’s always because my mom and i have an argument.
i don’t know why i’m still alive, because i really want to die.
today it was because of money (again?).
she gave me $100 for grocery shopping (while she waited in the car) and the bill came up to $106 (even after careful picking of items to make sure i’m under the $100 mark). i had to take out items from the bags at the cashier just to have enough to pay. how embarrassing. i threw my temper when i got back to the car. and she kept yelling at how much i’m spending on junk food. yeah and she just friggin triggered my anxiety.
i had an anxiety attack.
i came home ran straight to my room slammed the door and vented my frustrations.
i don’t know when but if this goes on, one of the anxiety attacks’ gonna really get me killed.
maybe then i’ll be free.
free from all that misery.

i hate how she’s treating me.
she knows i have psychological problems but she’s gonna make things worsen by agitating me? by making me feel more hopeless and useless?

i seek comfort in junkfood and if she’s going to take that privilege away from me, there’s no comfort in life, there’s nothing that’s gonna keep me away from death.
she just wants me to be healthy? but if i’m healthy but miserable?

whom i meet only once a year, for barely 2 hours each visit. (lunar new year visiting)
this year, twice, only because i have to interview an old folk for a school project.
i truly am guilty, and ashamed.

random stuff i found out about her:
she is more easy-going than i thought she would be
she’s been hospitalized before, 5 years ago (and i didn’t even know)
she has many friends and loves hanging out
she speaks malay better than mandarin
she has to take lots of medication everyday to sustain her life
she goes to malaysia for short trips with her friends
she doesn’t miss her granddaughter (me) a lot or yearn to see me/spend time with me that much
she dotes on her grandsons a lot, probably because she takes care of them since forever
my mom’s the one who gives her a lot of money and offers to sponsor her if she wants to travel around
my mom takes her out to restaurants for meals occasionally

it was.. awkward. but i’m glad i visited her (always wanted to but didn’t) because afterall she’s my grandmother and she’s old and… well yeah.

my cousin, my 3rd aunt(his mom), uncle (my youngest aunt’s husband), my favorite aunt (most senior!), my youngest aunt, mom, me, dad, aunt, uncle(aunt’s wife), cousin (their child)

my friends who’re like family (: thanks for coming!

the best thing bout birthday parties, CAKES!! and yummy nom nom noms. (:

belted up together on the road trip!

<3

and then with my pretty mummy!

teehee

picture taken at my sis’s home in perth (:
so glad to finally see her! and seeing her so independent, taking care of herself and all! so proud of her :D

i hope that by now, you do know how it feels like to be abandoned, to be deserted, to be left alone when all you need is someone to cry to.

and i’m glad i’m past that phase, because i’m thankful that i’m alone.

i like my lover meaty (:

eat more! (though i know you can never beat me! teehee i have an unbelievable appetite)

my mom has facebook!
omg right!
anyone’s mummys and daddys who has facebook can ask them add each other!
lol :D

like my mummy and daddy, i miss my sis! and wondering if she’s able to adapt well in aussie, hoping she’d be capable of taking good care of herself, manage her time and finance well there, able to do her chores without a maid ):, whether she’s lonely being so far away from home, having few friends there to accompany her, blah blah blah
omg
and so cute, my dad rushes to the phone upon hearing it ring every single time, hoping its my sis! see so gan jiong! afterall she’s the one who’s always doing us proud, my daddy’s pinning all hopes on her! omg hope she doesn’t feel too much pressure!

the last picture we took together at home:

and one last picture together at the airport before her flight:

kinda lost contact with lotsa friends so i only went to esmond’s place for chinese new year visiting.. lol.. quite sad huh!
but anyway it was nice catching up with an old friend!

my sis’s leaving for aussie in less than 48 hours ):
everyone’s so gonna miss her.. she’s not coming home for chinese new year dinner next year!
shall we go over to aussie for cny dinner next year? :D
my mom keeps harping on going to aussie and even wants to stay there often, yet she’s hesitating about going there on chinese new year next year. tsk!
shall give all my cny wishes to my sis, hope she does well in her studies, takes good care of herself, stays cheerful and healthy, have fun and we will be visiting soon!!!!!!!!!!! wait for us! :D

dvd marathon

cried myself to sleep last night, woke up with extremely swollen eyes.

shopping with mom was nice, got myself a skirt, a dress and a button blouse, she got herself a nice blouse too

then nothing else caught my eye so we headed home.

as far as i can remember, i have no memory of my mom cooking anything for the family.
i secretly wish she’d inherited some of my grandmother’s culinary skills.(tho my dad speaks ill of her MSG-loaded dishes) but as long as it tastes good, right!

then my mom fried noodles today (what’s got into her dude)
maybe she’s suddenly been enlightened to show some motherly love (lol)
but she was so unconfident of her cooking and warned everyone before we consume (so unlike her, she’s always brimming with confidence especially in her business suit)

i wanted to just tell her that it will taste good as long as its been prepared by her.
and how much i wanted to taste her ‘orh-ni’ (some yam dessert we had at the wedding dinner that night) that my aunt spoke so highly of.

when will she step foot in the kitchen again?

the week ended off in dismal.
i really don’t wanna talk about it.

i hate the fact that my mom’s frequent trips overseas is making me feel that i can live without her love.

i hate how i get paranoid about people disliking/hating me.
there’s so much i hate about myself, i’m certain there’s much more others hate about me.

mom was free today
while in the mall, i wanted to get a jacket, a really comfy cosy one..
browsed around couple of shops, went to timerland, tried on, then i saw the price tag omg $250. my mom didn’t even ask for the price she just asked if i wanted it :/
it looked too simple to cost $250, so decided to look around for more choices.
i ended up with a $200 one, damn comfy! but still a tad too pricey for a simple jacket? idk but my mom just signed for it without complaining, just as long as i liked it :/
i feel like sucha loserish freeloader ):
sigh
but that’s gonna be my favourite jacket from now on (:
looks like a typical timberland urban country-ish jacket but the inside its damn damn damn damn comfy like wooly! i can soo feel my mommy’s love when i wear the jacket. lol

my mom agreed to get me a macbook without hesitation when i complained about the state of my ibook.. (couple months back)
but why do i still keep hesitating if i should get it..
it’s always been on my want list.. since like forever. and i ought to get all hyped up and impatient and rushing her to get it but all that’s been going on was procrastination.
i did not even speak to her about it again ever since.
i just feel that i don’t deserve to get it from her.. fucking shit i already feel damn guilty of being a useless wreck spending so much money everyday and now alot of money at a go urgh.
i can’t even source for better macbook deals so as to lighten my guilt. fucking shit.
i’m so fucking useless.

my parents want me to become a christian.
well they’re not forcing me. just suggesting, and manipulating me in the most subtle way, hoping that i would give in.
i do not want to have a religion..
given my character, i hate rules and restrictions, i hate teachings and preaching, i hate followings and whatnots.
furthermore a wreck that i already am, i do not want to make myself look even more pathetic by having a religion just to have something to fall back on or rely on, or to suppress my misery.
i do not want to have to go to church every week with a blank mind, hoping to get it done and over with and leave.
i do not want to do something against my will.

btw i’m saying this only because i know people like this: i do not want to ACT like i’ve changed, ACT like i have no hatred nor temper, ACT like a friend to everyone and be a hypocrite to everyone around me. and deep down, having unspoken complaints and loathing.

i know my parents meant well, and churches are pretty, especially if i could go to churches all over the world (to photograph), but there’s no way i can accept a religion..

and i would hate it more if anyone would attempt to persuade or manipulate me in any way at all..

i feel that the best way to spend time together during mealtime is to have steamboat
i thought it’d be kinda pointless to drive out and have a quick 30 min meal at a fine dining place and then head home.. through steamboat, more time is spent together, thus more time for conversations (eg. while waiting for food to cook)
now its no wonder why its become a tradition to have steamboat during lunar new year

i wish for more steamboat sessions..

if you think that my existence is such a pain-in-the-ass, just say the word and i’ll disappear for good.
seriously.

only now do i wish i were a little more forgetful.

what i do everyday, is what i find comfort in. and if my freedom and ability to do so gets obstructed, i get so frustrated, thoughts of death will just keep ringing in my head like a broken alarm.
i guess thats why i get so pissed whenever my mom questions or interferes in whatever i’m doing.
i get extremely paranoid even when she’s just peering at me when i’m watching tv at the couch. paranoid about what she’d think about me, like what a loser i am being sucha couch potato all day long and stuff like that.
yeah i get extremely paranoid about people watching my move.
i need my space. and if anyone takes that away from me, i don’t know what’s gonna keep me alive anymore.
i know i’m detestable. i don’t hate myself any lesser than any of you do.

dear mom
like every other parent, i’m sure you gave birth in hope that your children would be able to give you a good life after your retirement.
i’m sorry i’m such an utter disappointment, and the more i see you work so hard everyday, and the more i look at how i’m spending so much money eating and sleeping my life away, the more i think of just ending my life.
we had such a huge fight today and i really wanted to tell you this.
i want to end my life right now because i know i would be incapable of providing for you when you are old. rather than being a burden and leech off you, only for you to find that i’m such a useless wreck in the end, i’d rather just die.
i have no dream jobs, no goals. i do not want to get out to the big world and industry and slog away just to earn a living.
i do not want to start working.
i do not want to work.
all i want to do is to travel, do what i want, enjoy myself. and you are incapable of providing what i desire.
so we had a huge fight today and when i wanted to die, you said you would die with me.
but i guess you said that only because you had so much hopes for me and felt i could provide for you when you’re old. so my death would cause you to lose all that.
i really wanted to tell you that i’m sorry and as much as i want to, i can’t be able to provide for you.
if my living is nothing but a burden, i should might as well die.
i don’t know how long more i can hold on, but if one day i’m gone, this is why.

sorry for being unfilial
sorry for wasting so many of your years taking care of me
sorry for wasting so much of your money raising me
sorry for everything.

and i guess you would be disappointed to know, that since the day you bailed me when i was in secondary two, that wasn’t the end.
i thought i learnt my lesson, but i started doing it again.
and i got caught, again. but this time without the involvement of police and parents.
so nobody knew.
i was alone.
and from that day, i cooped myself at home every single day, afraid to go out lest i commit again.
that day was .. hell.
i came back, as though nothing happened.
but those images kept flashing, kept haunting me. and i can’t stop hating myself.
and it was so.. so.. painful to deal with it alone..
i hate going out.
thoughts of doing it again..
no.. i can’t go out..
i can’t..

so my mom’s in germany right now..

and i’m still stuck in singapore.

why is it so hard to find someone to fly with ):

whenever my mom goes overseas in the past, even on just a short road trip to malaysia, she would sms back pretty often.
not anymore..
not any sms from her till now….
i guess she thinks that i dislike her now, so she doesn’t bother to contact me anymore?
or she prolly leaves us too often enough to get use to not contacting anymore.

we ended things pretty roughly the day she flew off, so i guess that pretty much explains..

i don’t dislike her.. i just dislike the way she deals with situation.

i guess i’m just damn difficult to get along.

telepathy, seriously.

been surfing for travel deals but they’re mostly over my budget ):
i really really wanna have a good getaway.
i miss roaming around in a foreign city, taking random shots, searching my way with a handy map, learning to live their life, learning to take their public transports, ..
i wish i won a free ticket to somewhere ):
even a cruise trip would suffice.
i just want to have fun for the first time in a long time.
mom’s flying off to germany on the 12th.
i hate the thought of others having to spend more money than i am.

i hate the fact that i am broke.

and i hate the fact that my mom doesn’t even realise my bank account has been almost empty for a few months already.

i really want to say sorry and do something to make it up to you…
thats how i feel minutes after throwing a tantrum.
which happens almost everyday. (if we do meet at all)

finding faults with everything, everyone.
that’s all i ever do..
nothing’s ever enough, nothing’s ever good enough.

however irksome i see in someone else, the most detestable is indeed myself.

tell me how not to hate myself.

omg i have the best daddy ever.
he noticed my research assignment brief about eclecticism that i left sitting in the living room.
and he took the initiative to look it up online and printed some notes and pictures for me.
and when i didn’t wanna go to school just to print the report and submit everything, he did it on my behalf!
how about my mom
heh. i thought she was sincerely helpful when she asked if i needed any help in my assignments. in the end she just makes empty promises. she just isn’t someone i can count on anymore.
the other time i asked her if she could find any wood samples, she got my dad to ‘help’ to keep a lookout together right, in the end my dad did everything instead.
i’ve been nothing but pissy and rude to her nowadays.. i just can’t help it.
i want to be filial, but when i face her, i just couldn’t speak to her nicely at all.

oh on a side note, i heard my maid’s gonna leave once her contract ends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i can’t stand her.
her voice, her laughter, her slow-motion movements.
hogging onto the phone the entire day, going for ‘walks’ with her retarded maid friends for drinks.
and when someone presses the bell she takes her own sweet time to walk slowly to the gate. then the retarded dog keeps barking. bloody hell no wonder when i press the gate she takes so long to open right?!

i bloody hate whoever who’s nice to her.
its like i hate anything/anyone AGAINST ME.

there was once i was walking towards home and i saw her talking to another retarded maid right, i friggin stood there and glared at them.
well she hecked care but the other maid got scared so they ended their conversation.

oh and when she tells me off like ‘don’t make messy this or that LAH’ i would deliberately create MORE MESS.
its like i didn’t mean to dirty the place in the first place what right.
plus I HATE PEOPLE TELLING ME WHAT TO DO.
even my parents don’t dare tell me off.

ohh another reason why my dad’s like the best everrrr
the other time he collected my drawing file on my behalf because i didnt’t wanna stay back in school just to wait for my lecturer to finish marking right, then my lecturer was like telling him i’ve got lotsa incomplete works and all.
then my dad just called and encouraged me ‘he said your work is very good and it’s a pity you didn’t complete your works or else you’d definitely score’ he did ask why i didn’t complete and i was speechless because well you don’t think i’m gonna tell him i was too lazy to complete do you?
then he said that its a waste but he just asked me to try my best to complete next time.
best dad ever!

however hard he tries to make conversations, she remains aloof.. disinterested.. and sometimes showing signs of annoyance.

why can’t she see that he’s the best husband one can ever have, and the best dad one can ever be..

so my mom took 2 days off her hectic schedule and decided to stay home this weekend and try to ‘bond’ with the family that she single-handedly ruined.
well its something that can be re-built in just a couple of days huh. easy huh. piece of cake huh.
well we were supposed to go buy ingredients to bake together but i ditched the plan and went out and she persisted on and sms-ed me if i wanted to go showrooms together and i just.. didn’t. i know how much it would upset her from the moment i told her i didnt wanna bake with her. well it was a difficult decision for me alright.
i deliberately stayed out most of my saturday.
drowned myself in suki sushi buffet.

(had great company paul <3 great catching up :D)

so sunday.
i decided to just stay home.
then this had to happen.
with a strict tone somehow like lecturing me 'this is your 3rd bowl already how can your stomach fit so much food'
yeah she wants to control how much i eat now ya?
fucking shit.
i eat that much 7 days a week, 30 days a month.
and out of the 30 days a month, this one and only particular day she happens to see me eat alot throughout the entire day. so she decided to try to lecture me about it.
how about the fucking other 29 days of the rest of the month.
let me gorge myself to death and know nothing about it?
so she knows nothing about my life and when she comes across something wrong then she start to ‘care’?!
she just isn’t fit to tell me what and what NOT to do anymore.
i argued back of course.
asking her not to interfere in how much i eat.
‘i’m your mother of course i want to care’
yo mama, you care about me 1 day out of 30 days a month. thanks ah.
well drama drama.
always ends with a cold war, which she will try to put to a stop by being extra nice back to make it up to me.
yeah so back to friggin square one when she shouldnt even have lectured me because
1. it doesn’t work
2. we end up in a cold war
3. she doesnt want me to dislike her
4. she tries to make it up to me as if it was her fault for lecturing me
what a dilemma.
it’s tough being a mom, not to even mention, my mom.
but it’s disheartening being her daughter.

i do not want to continue anymore.

so my saturday afternoon was spent with my dad and sis at Sizzler’s!
a belated birthday lunch for my sis (:
been so long since we dined together.. glad that we did!

stayed from only 11.30am till 2-ish though..
not as worth it as the previous times that i went, many many rounds!
my dad and sis were full already and stopped and i would feel bad if i continued while they just wait and watch me eat somemore.. didnt wanna gross my dad out with how much food i can eat either :X
plus the toilet was flooded, quite gross, so i didn’t feel like enjoying food there anymore
would love to go again soon :D

well we took a bus there because my mom drove the car.
my dad had to pay by cash because my mom maxed out her supplementary card for their account.
we enjoyed our lunch because it didn’t seem like a missing person anyway. (my mom’s rarely around)

well so after lunch my sis went off first, then my dad and i took a bus back, went to lorong lew lian and bought somemore food back :D

tomorrow he’ll be marketing for steamboat ingredients and we’re gonna have steamboat for dinner (:
no one’s pinning any hope for my mom to be back for dinner, cus we know for sure she won’t.